Really good! “Wriggling like a bad meal inside the metal belly of the train” is particularly vivid. The same visceral feelings work for the NYC subway, though I think it’s less cosmopolitan
Thank you Ted! Your support means a lot. And I love how the same feeling can echo in different parts of the world - it makes writing extra special for me 💜
After I read this, I imagined what If as a form, this writing would be better without paragraphs and let them become a rush hour-ish. It must feel like words are melding.
I am amazed by the vivid image of a train and station in the most crowded and hectic time. I feel like I am inside that metal belly of a steel dragon
I LOVED all your descriptions in this piece! Especially "wriggling like a bad meal inside the metal belly of the train." In the handful of minutes I was reading, I felt like I was breathing the same air as the narrator.
really puts me there, love it!
Ah, I'm so glad! thanks for reading
This like a prose poem. Love it.
Thank you LeeAnn!
Wow! Intricate! It transported me there and also back to my days being transported on a train pressed together like sardines.
Thank you Heidi! I really appreciate this.
Beautifully written. Love it. Reminded me of Bombay local trains
Thank you Aditi! And yes, Bombay locals are such an experience
Your vivid descriptions manage to hold us till the end... It felt claustrophobic and also felt the joy of finally getting fresh air.
I’m so glad that the descriptions held you! Thanks for reading Harshal
Wow! I was taken on the metro ride I'd never want to take! Splendid writing, Anagha!
Hahaha! Thanks for coming along with me in spirit - and for reading. I appreciate your comment ☺️
I am lucky enough to read such a masterpiece perfectly weaved with needed adverbs and adjectives at free of cost. Thanks.
Wow, I appreciate it, Anadi! Thanks for reading ☺️
Really good! “Wriggling like a bad meal inside the metal belly of the train” is particularly vivid. The same visceral feelings work for the NYC subway, though I think it’s less cosmopolitan
Thank you Ted! Your support means a lot. And I love how the same feeling can echo in different parts of the world - it makes writing extra special for me 💜
After I read this, I imagined what If as a form, this writing would be better without paragraphs and let them become a rush hour-ish. It must feel like words are melding.
I am amazed by the vivid image of a train and station in the most crowded and hectic time. I feel like I am inside that metal belly of a steel dragon
That’s a really cool idea, Danny! Thanks for that. If you ever attempt a rush hour piece without paragraphs, I would love to read it.
Thanks for reading and for your comment!
I LOVED all your descriptions in this piece! Especially "wriggling like a bad meal inside the metal belly of the train." In the handful of minutes I was reading, I felt like I was breathing the same air as the narrator.
Oh my gosh! Thank you for this generous comment, I’m really moved ❤️
Wonderful writing, I felt dropped right into the scene and my senses felt it all.
Wow thanks Amy! I’m glad I could take you there
Good description. I'm right there, claustrophobic & overwhelmed. I'm with Don - ready for the book!
Omg, too kind Karen!
loved every word of this, i genuinely felt as though i was there!!
thank you dru! means a ton!
Wonderful writing, Anagha. I'm proud to witness your writing career as it grows. I will be first in line for your first published book!
Oh, I'm so touched Don! This is a huge, huge compliment.
Your vivid writing put me right into the scene, Anagha. It was a full sensory experience. Brilliantly written!
I really appreciate it Conny! I'm so glad I was able to put you into the scene. Thank you for reading <3
Beautiful described.
Thank you so much Sandolores!